Communication skills are the basis that helps a child find friends, make acquaintances and realize himself in society. When a person is isolated in his own little world, it is difficult for him to become in demand and popular. But if he has learned to convey his thoughts to others and communicate with people, he holds the key to personal success.
But this key is not given to every person at birth. The good news is that a child’s communication skills can and should be developed. And our article will tell parents how to do it correctly.
What are communication skills?
Translated from Latin, “communicative” literally means: “communicative”, “sociable”.
Communication is not a separate personality quality, but a whole set of different skills. And it is expressed in the ability to communicate with other people, the ability to build relationships with them.
Conventionally, communication skills are divided into two groups:
- skills that help a person convey his thoughts and feelings (speaking skills, self-control, self-presentation);
- skills that help to understand others (the ability to negotiate, empathize, listen and hear the interlocutor).
Communication games
Polite words.
Goal: developing respect in communication, the habit of using polite words.
The game is played with a ball in a circle. Children throw a ball to each other, saying polite words. Say only the words of greeting (hello, good afternoon, hello, we are glad to see you, we are glad to meet you); gratitude (thank you, thank you, please be kind); apology (sorry, pardon, sorry, sorry); farewells (goodbye, see you later, good night).
Situation games.
Goal: to develop the ability to enter into a conversation, exchange feelings, experiences, emotionally and meaningfully express your thoughts using facial expressions and pantomime.
Children are invited to role-play a number of situations, for example, the guys are playing an interesting game - ask the guys to accept you. What will you do if they don't want to accept you?
Press conference.
Goal: to develop the ability to politely answer interlocutors’ questions, formulate a response briefly and correctly; develop speech skills.
All children in the group participate in a press conference on any topic (for example: “Your day off”, “Excursion to the zoo”, “Friend’s birthday”, “At the circus”, etc.). One of the participants in the press conference, the “guest” (the one who will be asked all the questions), sits in the center and answers any questions from the children.
Why does a child need communication skills?
So as not to be left alone. To become a member of society, to be accepted by others, while remaining yourself. If a person does not know how to talk about himself, but only listen to others, he will not become an individual, he will lose his “I”.
The other side is that the child knows how to talk exclusively about himself, but does not know how to listen to others. Such a person will not be able to build quality social connections in the future or expand his social circle.
A little person acquires communication skills gradually as he grows and matures. Step by step, he learns to read non-verbal information (facial expressions, gestures, tone of voice), then he learns the first words. Growing up, he acquires the ability to listen and hear his interlocutor, put himself in his place, and perceive the shades of human relationships.
The first communication skills are formed in the family, then in kindergarten, school, and then throughout life. Therefore, the ability or inability to interact with others depends on those processes that occur from early childhood until the period of maturity.
Some children get along better with others, make contact, and find it easier to communicate with peers and adults. Others experience difficulty and discomfort. And although innate qualities should not be discounted, communication is still one of the aspects of personality development. This means that the ability to communicate can and should be developed.
To develop communication skills in a child, you need to help him master three basics:
- desire to communicate;
- knowledge of the basics of social communication;
- the actual ability to communicate.
Desire to communicate
This means that the child himself must feel the need to communicate with people around him. And this need can and should be developed. If you don't do this, there will be no progress. An adult, due to life experience, can motivate himself to communicate with others. Children don't know how to do this.
Know how to communicate
The desire to interact with others is not enough. You also need to know how exactly this is done. Young children do not know about the norms and rules of communication. Parents suggest how to resolve conflicts with peers, maintain a conversation, say hello, etc.
Ability to communicate
This point follows from the previous one, when communicative knowledge is applied in practice. The ability to communicate consists of a whole complex of practical skills:
- the ability to interest an interlocutor and attract his attention;
- goodwill, friendliness;
- the ability to accept the opinion of the interlocutor and not impose your own;
- the ability to argue information and tactfully defend one’s point of view;
- the ability to captivate your interlocutor, to interest him in your opinion and ideas;
- ability to resolve conflict situations, seek balance when resolving controversial situations.
Another important component of good communication is active listening. It is usually most difficult for choleric children. They can’t wait to tell as much as possible about themselves, their impressions, and hobbies. The interlocutor’s statements are relegated to the background.
If a child has successfully mastered these three skills, then we can say that his communication skills are truly developed.
Social and communicative education of preschool children: goals and objectives
Social communicative development of preschool children is one of the most important areas in the education of preschoolers.
These are the skills and abilities that will be useful to kindergarten students when they become adults.
IMPORTANT! The goal of this direction is the socialization of preschool children, introducing them to universal human values, social norms, traditions of the family and the state.
Within the framework of this goal, the following tasks :
- In the process of education, create conditions in which preschoolers can accept and master the values and norms of society.
- Develop children's ability to empathize, communicate kindly and interact with peers and adults.
- Help children become independent, purposeful, and learn to independently regulate their own activities.
- To form in them respect for their own family, the team in which they are located, as well as a positive attitude towards work and creativity.
- Teach children to behave safely at home, in society, and in nature. Prepare them to interact with peers.
Features of the development of communication skills in preschoolers
At each age stage, children's communication skills develop and improve.
From birth to 2 years
During this period, the child takes his first steps not only physically, but also communicatively. The social circle of children at this age is limited to mom, dad and other close relatives. Children learn to convey their needs to adults and, in turn, understand their interlocutor.
Methods for developing communication skills
The main ways to develop communication skills are exercise and play.
Before choosing activities for your child, it is useful to take note of a few recommendations:
- Do not try to use a large number of exercises or games at one time, especially with preschoolers. Their performance is low and fatigue is rapid.
- Training should be carried out when the child is in a good mood: not overtired, not hungry, does not want to sleep.
- All exercises and games will only be beneficial if the child really wants to do them. Therefore, you should not force him to take classes; it is better to conduct them when he himself expresses a desire.
Any game or exercise must be played out in such a way that children understand that interacting with each other is very important.
Games to develop communication skills
Any games to develop communication skills must be age-appropriate, that is, be accessible and understandable. If several preschool children are playing at the same time (in the yard or in the family), you need to give each of them the opportunity to participate.
It is the adult who controls the activities of the players, sets an example, explains the rules and makes sure that everyone is involved in the game. If one of the players pulled away and became shy, you need to help him return, but do it unobtrusively, gently.
- Game "Animal Choir". Any popular children's song is chosen for the game. But you need to perform it not with words, but trying to imitate the voice of different animals: “quack-quack”, “meow-meow”, “kva-kva-kva”. Each player portrays a specific animal and performs his part of the song. All the children finish singing.
- Game "Compliments". The goal of the game is to develop mutual politeness and emotional contacts. Participants should say pleasant, beautiful words to each other, trying not to repeat themselves. When giving compliments, you need to look your interlocutor in the eyes. Anyone who receives a compliment must thank the speaker in return.
- Game "Mousetrap". This game will teach you how to find a way out of difficult situations. All participants form a tight circle, in the middle of which the “mouse” hides. She must find a way out of the circle or persuade one of the participants to let her through. If the game takes place in a close company, for example, with the participation of parents, the little player can be hugged tightly and offered to free himself through persuasion.
Exercises to develop communication skills
It is better to carry them out based on clarity. That is, for work you will need a board and pictures. If several children participate in an exercise, they perform them in turns. The rest of the participants observe, and if the performer allows, they can give advice.
To develop communication skills, you can use the following exercises:
- Place cards on the board with images of people on whose faces you can track certain emotions. Next, you need to tell a short story about a specific person. For example: “This is Vasya, he is sad because his favorite toy is broken.” The presenter asks the children how they can help Vasya, the players take turns offering their options.
- Divide the board into two halves, mark one with a “+” sign, the other with a “-”. Next, the children take turns going to the board and are offered several pictures. Each participant chooses a “bad” and a “good” option. It is important that the direction of the pictures is the same, for example, a whole and a broken cup, a smiling and a crying boy. Players need to make up a short story based on the pictures.
- Collective listening to a work of art. It's better to start with small fairy tales. An adult reads it to the children, and then everyone collectively discusses the plot. Particular attention should be paid to the actions of the characters, highlighting good deeds. Negative aspects also need to be noted, together with the children, figuring out why this cannot be done.
Advice! If a small participant finds it difficult to perform any exercise, you can help him. But there is no need to complete tasks for children. You can ask leading questions or voice clues. It is better to start the exercise with the simplest elements, gradually complicating the task.
Causes of communication difficulties
Preschool age is a particularly important period in education. It is the age of initial formation of the child’s personality. At this time, rather complex relationships arise in the child’s communication with peers, which significantly influence the development of his personality.
M.I. Lisina in her book “Problems of Ontogenesis and Communication” writes that “Communication is a necessary condition for the mental development of a child. The need for communication early becomes his basic social need. Communication with peers plays a vital role in the life of a preschooler. It is a condition for the formation of social qualities of a child’s personality, the manifestation and development of the principles of collective relationships between children” [4].
Many domestic and foreign researchers have addressed the problem of children's dysfunction in interpersonal relationships in preschool age: L.S. Vygotsky, D.B. Elkonin, A.V. Zaporozhets, Ya.L. Kolominsky, V.N. Myasishchev, A.P. Usova, A.S. Spivakovskaya, V.S. Mukhina, N.Ya. Mikhailenko, M.I. Lisina, T.A. Repina, A. Maslov, A. Bandura, I.I. Thompson, D.E. May et al.
The focus of research is on internal conflicts that lead to psychological isolation from peers and the child’s exclusion from the life and activities of the preschool group. Therefore, timely diagnosis and subsequent correction of children's relationships becomes relevant at the present stage of development of the children's team.
But before you start working on increasing the “social status” of a preschool child, you need to understand why his peers are shunning him. Child psychologists identify several personal qualities in children that can make it difficult for them to communicate with other children:
- selfishness; when communicating with peers, a selfish child encounters a boomerang effect: not receiving support, understanding and empathy from him, children show indifference to his own feelings;
— aggressiveness; frequent outbursts of anger and a penchant for dangerous, painful games can scare away even the most well-meaning children;
- touchiness; The child’s habit of constantly sorting things out and shedding tears for any reason leads to the fact that peers get tired of making excuses and apologizing. The “touchy child” counts on everyone rushing to console him, but after a while his friends stop being manipulated;
— passivity ; The lack of one’s own opinion and strong attachment to friends do not allow the child to gain the respect of peers. In addition, the baby cannot come up with an interesting game on his own and has difficulty finding something to do alone;
- shyness; this quality in itself does not repel peers. However, if a child is so shy that he is most often silent in a group, this can lead to serious problems.
In many ways, a child’s communication and behavior is mediated by the social situation in which he grows up. And the main question is “How to create an atmosphere that would encourage children to have positive communication and active interaction?”
Both the family and the child’s teacher should participate in resolving this issue. Adults should be positive role models:
- you must try not to show your negative emotions towards other children;
- do not interfere in children's conflicts unless absolutely necessary. By protecting your child too actively, you prevent him from learning to listen and understand the enemy;
- encourage any initiative of the child in communication;
- do not pull down your child in front of other children;
- teach the child to determine the feelings and intentions of other people by facial expressions;
- observe other children with the child, draw his attention to the sequence of events occurring with the object of observation;
- Do not limit your communication with your child to simple sentences, but conduct a long, detailed dialogue.
Thus, the study of deviations in the development of interpersonal relationships at the very first stages of personality development seems relevant and important, primarily because conflict in a child’s relationships with peers can act as a serious threat to personal development. That is why, information about the peculiarities of the development of a child’s personality in difficult, unfavorable conditions at that stage of its genesis. When the basic stereotypes of behavior and the psychological foundations of the most important relationships of an individual to the surrounding social world, to oneself begin to be laid, clarifying knowledge about the causes, nature, logic of the development of interpersonal relationships and possible ways of timely diagnosis and correction of conflict relationships becomes of paramount importance.
How to develop your child's communication skills in everyday life
In order for a child to learn, and most importantly, to want to communicate with people around him, from childhood he needs to be provided with:
- psychological comfort;
- the opportunity to communicate with people of different ages;
- support for parents and teachers in organizing communication in the group.
In the first years of a person’s life, communication skills are shaped or not shaped by parents and family members. It is they who have the most important role - to teach the child to communicate. You don't have to be a teacher to do this. It is enough to take note of a few tips and effective techniques.
The role of the family in the development of communication skills in a child
Sometimes parents make a mistake in developing the communication skills of their son or daughter. But dads and moms themselves often don’t even know about it.
Here are some examples of erroneous patterns of behavior in adult-child relationships that make it difficult to develop communication skills:
- "The pride of the family." Almost all parents consider their children to be the best and wonderful in everything. But the boundaries between unconditional love and permissiveness collapse when the child is recognized as exceptional, superior to his peers in everything. Every little person’s wish is fulfilled, all his mistakes and mistakes are forgiven, not discussed or analyzed. Such children grow up to be selfish, spoiled beyond measure.
- "Favorite." Often appears in large families. The attitude towards it is almost the same as with the “Pride of the Family” model. But only in the case of a pet, the child is singled out by only one family member. The other children feel this acutely, and relationships between brothers and sisters become envious and negative.
- "Cinderella". Another typical behavior pattern for large families. From childhood, the child is assigned a secondary role. His whole life is subordinated to his brother or sister, whom his parents, for some reason, consider more successful and beloved. “Cinderella” is forced to look after the younger one or please the older one. The result is envy and an inferiority complex.
- "Forever guilty." Such a child only causes irritation to other family members. It is he who is the cause of all troubles and is to blame for everything, even for what he did not do. Throughout childhood, a little person is terrified of punishment, of parents’ displeasure, lives in eternal fear, and becomes an outcast.
- "Good girl" (boy). From birth, this child absorbed the concepts of “good”, “bad”, “decent” and “indecent”. His whole life is subject to a whole set of rules. The opinions and interests of such children are often ignored. For parents, only one thing is important - to let others understand: the child was raised conscientiously. Growing up, a person with an excellent student complex may, on principle, commit indecent and immoral acts.
- "Problem child." Too noisy, too mischievous, too active. He does not know how and does not want to hear others; pleas, persuasion and punishment do not work on him. Often this model of behavior is due to the fact that parents do not pay enough attention to raising the child, are unable or do not want to find a common language with him.
- "Crystal Vase". Children who have experienced a serious shock, trauma or serious illness often grow up too fragile, vulnerable and protected. Those close to him protect him from everything that, in their opinion, could harm him. Such a child grows up without initiative, in the belief that everyone owes him, constantly waiting for concessions.
Ways to develop communication skills
There are three groups of methods - visual, verbal and practical.
Visual methods are used more often in kindergarten. Both direct and indirect methods are used. The direct method includes the observation method and its varieties: excursions, inspections of the premises, examination of natural objects. These methods are aimed at accumulating the content of speech and providing communication between two signaling systems. Indirect methods are based on the use of visual clarity.
This is looking at toys, paintings, photographs, describing paintings and toys, telling stories about toys and paintings. They are used to consolidate knowledge, vocabulary, develop the generalizing function of words, and teach coherent speech. Indirect methods can also be used to get acquainted with objects and phenomena that cannot be encountered directly.
Verbal methods are used less frequently in kindergarten: reading and storytelling of works of art, memorization, retelling, general conversation, storytelling without relying on visual material. All verbal methods use visual techniques: showing objects, toys, paintings, looking at illustrations, since the age characteristics of young children and the nature of the word itself require visualization.
Practical methods are aimed at using speech skills and abilities and improving them. Practical methods include various didactic games, dramatization games, dramatizations, didactic exercises, plastic sketches, and round dance games. They are used to solve all speech problems.
Depending on the nature of children’s speech activity, reproductive and productive methods can be roughly distinguished.
Reproductive methods are based on reproducing speech material and ready-made samples. In kindergarten, they are used mainly in vocabulary work, in the work of educating the sound culture of speech, and less in the formation of grammatical skills and coherent speech. Observation methods and its varieties can roughly be classified as reproductive.
Looking at pictures, reading fiction, retelling, memorizing, games-dramatization of the content of literary works, many didactic games, i.e. all those methods by which children master words and the laws of their combination, phraseological phrases, some grammatical phenomena, for example control of many words, master by imitation of sound pronunciation, retell close to the text, copy the teacher’s story.
Productive methods involve children constructing their own coherent utterances, when the child does not simply reproduce the language units known to him, but selects and combines them in a new way each time, adapting to the communication situation. This is the creative nature of speech activity. From this it is obvious that productive methods are used in teaching coherent speech. These include generalizing conversation, storytelling, retelling with text restructuring, didactic games for the development of coherent speech, modeling method, creative tasks.
Depending on the task of speech development, methods of vocabulary work, methods of educating the sound culture of speech, etc. are distinguished.
Methodological techniques for developing speech are traditionally divided into three main groups: verbal, visual and playful.
Verbal techniques are widely used. These include speech pattern, repeated speaking, explanation, instructions, assessment of children's speech, question.
A speech model is a teacher’s correct, pre-thought-out speech activity, intended for children to imitate and guide them. The sample must be accessible in content and form. It is pronounced clearly, loudly and slowly. Since the model is given for imitation, it is presented before the children begin their speech activity. But sometimes, especially in older groups, a model can be used after children’s speech, but it will not serve for imitation, but for comparison and correction. The sample is used to solve all problems. It is especially important in younger groups.
Repeated pronunciation is the deliberate, repeated repetition of the same speech element (sound, word, phrase) with the aim of memorizing it. In practice, different repetition options are used: behind the teacher, behind other children, joint repetition of the teacher and children, choral repetition. It is important that repetition is offered to children in the context of an activity that interests them.
Explanation - revealing the essence of certain phenomena or methods of action. Widely used to reveal the meanings of words, to explain the rules and actions in didactic games, as well as in the process of observing and examining objects.
Directions – explaining to children the method of action to achieve a certain result. There are instructional, organizational and disciplinary instructions.
Assessment of child speech is a motivated judgment about a child’s speech utterance, characterizing the quality of speech activity. The assessment should not only be of a stating nature, but also educational. It is given so that all children can be guided by it in their statements.
Assessment has a great emotional impact on children. It is necessary to take into account individual and age characteristics, to ensure that it increases the child’s speech activity, interest in speech activity, and organizes his behavior. To do this, the assessment emphasizes, first of all, the positive qualities of speech, and speech defects are corrected using a sample and other methodological techniques.
A question is a verbal address that requires an answer. Questions are divided into main and auxiliary. The main ones can be ascertaining (reproductive) - “who? What? Which? which? Where? How? Where?" and search ones, requiring the establishment of connections and relationships between phenomena - “why? For what? how are they similar? Auxiliary questions can be leading and suggestive.
Visual techniques - showing illustrative material, showing the position of the organs of articulation when teaching correct sound pronunciation.
Game techniques can be verbal and visual. They arouse the child’s interest in activities, enrich the motives of speech, create a positive emotional background of the learning process and thereby increase children’s speech activity and the effectiveness of classes.
Methods and techniques for working on speech development
- Analysis of the child’s response (performed for the child so that he knows his shortcomings and can eliminate them).
- A generalizing conversation (after the children have accumulated a certain amount of knowledge, for example, after an excursion).
- Conversation. Prepared by the teacher in advance as a lesson.
- An imaginary situation.
- Problematic, more complex questions begin with the words why, because of what, how, compare, etc. that is, they require reflection and conclusions.
- Reproductive questions - simple ones begin with the words “which”, “what”, “when”. These questions do not require thinking; the child does not need to guess or think.
- Demonstration of movements, articulatory positions.
- Didactic games (“Whose House”, “Wonderful Bag”, “Dominoes”) - have several game rules or actions.
- Didactic stories with the inclusion of educational tasks.
- Didactic exercises are simpler than didactic games; they have one rule or action (say the opposite).
- Comment.
- Memorization.
- Onomatopoeia (when mastering sounds).
- Imitation of action, movement (in physical exercises).
- Dramatizations.
- Correction.
- Intonation emphasis of a word.
- Intriguing intonation (mysterious, mysterious, frightened, surprised, enthusiastic, etc.)
- Construction (letters, etc.).
- Modeling (text structure, word structure).
- Motivation for tasks (we will help Thumbelina, prepare Dunno for school, correct Carlson’s mistakes, give a gift to mom, find out who is the fastest in the group, etc.)
- Observation.
- Reminder.
- Example of correct pronunciation.
- Figurative physical education break.
- Reading.
- Explanation (for example, rules of conduct, games).
- Reflected speech – repetition of a speech sample after the teacher.
- Evaluation (motivated).
- Retelling.
- Repeats are individual for the child.
- Choral repetitions.
- Selection of generalizing concepts (table + chair + stool = furniture)
- Outdoor games with speech accompaniment, round dance games. (loaf)
- Hint (beginnings of words).
- Demonstration of articulatory movements.
- Explanation (dump truck dumps itself).
- Listening to records, tape recordings (own speech, speech with defects, speech samples).
- A conversation is an unprepared “conversation” that arose by chance, along the way.
- A story (about something, about an author, a natural phenomenon, etc.).
- Examination of drawings, paintings, models, filmstrips.
- Speech sample.
- Speech assignments are an assignment in which the child will be required to use speech. For example: “Go to Tamara Ivanovna and ask her to sharpen her pencils. Just say: “Tamara Ivanovna, please sharpen my pencils.” This is a sample speech instruction for a child with undeveloped speech or for children under the age group. Starting from the older group, you can give children instructions without a speech sample, that is, like this: “Go to Tamara Ivanovna and ask them to sharpen their pencils.”
- Speech situations are specially invented situations in which children practice speech skills. For example: “Tanya’s birthday is tomorrow, how are we going to congratulate her?” Children come up with their own congratulations, and the teacher tells them the words that need to be activated in speech and praises the children if they use exactly these words.
- Role-playing games.
- Advice.
- Conjugate speech - repeat with the teacher.
- Drawing up a plan for speaking - often verbally, what to say first, what to say later, and so on.
- Answer scheme (modeling) - what to say first, what to say later, and so on on a visual basis, for example, using diagrams.
- Interpretation of words (meanings of the words aquarium - glass box)
Possible impairment of communication skills
Communication skills are not always developed as quickly and efficiently as parents would like. There are several main communication problems in children:
- Painful mental state: anxiety, nervousness, rapid mood swings, increased excitability.
- Emotional deafness: the child does not perceive the emotions of people around him.
- Complete ignorance of others, isolation in one’s own world.
Problems in the development of communication skills usually occur in children who have the following character traits:
- Shyness, excessive isolation: such guys are usually silent, so they do not attract the children around them.
- Aggressiveness: A person who hurts others is not popular with their peers.
- Selfishness: children do not know how to empathize with others, and accordingly, they are treated the same way.
- Passivity: the child does not have his own opinion, is not able to come up with exciting activities for his peers, and does not participate in group games.
Bibliography
- Arushanova A. G: Development of communication abilities of a preschooler - Publisher: Sfera, 2012 -80 p.
- Emelyanova N.P., Rumyantseva M.V / N.P Emelyanova, M.V Rumyantseva Formation of communication skills of preschoolers in the process of communication - Publisher: Perm Mercury, 2015 - 125 p.
- How to teach children to communicate: A guide for child psychologists and speech therapists, St. Petersburg: SOYUZ, 2004. - 352 p.
- Kravtsova E., Purtova T. Teach children to communicate // Preschool education. - 1995. - No. 10.
- Education and training program in kindergarten / Ed. M.A. Vasilyeva, V.V. Gerbova, T.S. Komarova 3rd ed., revised. and additional - M.: Mozaika-Sintez, 2005. - 208 p.